Wordy Thirty: Altar x A. Ekirra

This post feels very long overdue.

For months, thoughts on what to post next poured in, but in the midst of living, I struggled to do the thing that always reminds me of how alive I really am — write.

Now, I can admit that I started off with pretty lofty goals back in June- goals of living life to the fullest, creating the art that I’ve always dreamed of, and having all of those who love and inspire me right by my side. In my defense, my 30th birthday felt like new beginnings, new chapters, and overall, what I assumed would be a new lease on life- new hobbies, new stories to tell, and then some. It absolutely ushered in all of those things, but the true “new lease on life” found me just shy of four months into my 30s.

If you had asked me what October 16th meant to me before April 2025, I would not have had an answer of significance. If you had asked me what October 16th meant after April 2025, I would have quickly told you that it was the date setting of one of my new favorite movies of all time, Sinners (2025). Ask me today, and I’ll likely pause to collect my thoughts and words in an effort to maintain my composure, then tell you that October 16th is now a date that I find myself reliving during my most reflective and vulnerable moments.

On October 16, 2025, my beloved grandfather, Milton Franklin Gaddy, transitioned to be with the ancestors.

Losing him was unexpected, and like most of us are guilty of, I naively believed, through the mind of a spoiled five-year-old granddaughter who just knew that heroes like him would live forever and through the mind of a thirty-year-old granddaughter that learned to appreciate the blessing and privilege of having a free-hearted, multi-skilled, benevolent badass being for a grandfather, that I would have at least another good thirty years with him. In my grief, I’ve come to know that this is the truth, but different from what I imagined.

The first time I watched Sinners (2025), following the passing of my grandfather, the chyron with the setting and date, “Clarksdale, Mississippi | October 16, 1932,” stuck out like a sore thumb. By this point, I’d seen the film at least a handful of times, but as I watched this time, I could not help but notice the date and the similarities between how my grandfather lived his life and how the “Smokestack twins,” Elijah “Smoke” Moore and Elias “Stack” Moore, their cousin Sammie Moore, and many other beautifully written characters of the film lived their lives. Themes of overcoming circumstances, family and fellowship, music, and freedom threaded these worlds together.

In reflecting, I drew the comparison of the twins’ quest and hard work for their “fine day to be free,” and my grandfather’s quest and hard work to obtain his version of freedom- ownership. Throughout the exposition of the film, we see the Smokestack twins face numerous obstacles in their efforts to prepare for their next big venture. From bad omens to boosters and realizing their dream may merely turn out to be a delusion, like my grandfather, the twins confronted every adversity with surefootedness and determination. Their unwavering tenacity and vivaciousness are what ultimately lead them to live out their dream of being “free”, albeit for one night. Due to my grandfather being a man of few words when it came to personal matters, I had only heard secondhand of all that he went through to become the man that I will always remember him as. Born in the 1950s in the Carolinian Jim Crow South, he faced challenges typical of anyone of that time, along with other challenges and vices one may encounter in their journey through adolescence and early adulthood life. As he strived to overcome his circumstances, he was led to work tirelessly for roughly 40 years at the only job he had before his early retirement. Along the way, he learned important ins and outs of life and skills that he passed down to his children and grandchildren. Lessons on the power of financial freedom, independence, and ownership, among others, were emphasized greatly. By the end of it all, my grandfather left behind many assets, a helluva story to tell, but more remarkably, he left an everlasting legacy.

Some of my fondest memories of my grandfather are centered around fellowship. If he wasn’t out in his garage, shopping for gadgets at any wholesale store or whatnots at the many salvage stores in our city and the surrounding area, getting ready to go to one of his many jobs he picked up after retiring, or working in his garden, he was likely to be found at the stove or the fryer, or the grill, or the smoker, or the blacktop. My grandfather loved to host his loved ones and was always finding something to feed anyone who stopped by. Of course, no time of fellowship is complete without music. A collector of stereos, vinyl records, cassette tapes, CDs, and eventually Bluetooth speakers, my grandfather’s love for music- specifically (rhythm and) blues music, like that of Sammie’s, pertinently provided a soothing soundtrack for his very lively, borderline cinematic life (after all, he was a Leo) every time he turned on a tune. After company left, the sounds of Lenny Williams, The Gap Band, and so many more artists filled the house, occasionally accompanied by his electric bass guitar. These memories of my grandfather, which formed my love for hosting, food, and music, remind me of the portion of the film in which the twins are gathering all of their family, friends, and more as they prepare for the opening night of their joint, “Club Juke”. While not completely alike (thankfully), “Club Juke” and “Papa’s House,” as we “grandchillin” called it, represented a sort of safe haven for all who visited. With the option to wind down or turn up, the togetherness and just-because celebrations were always one for the books.

Following the film’s apex, well into where Blues becomes Rock n Roll, we come to the point of the Smokestack twins’ story in which the themes of immortality and mortality come into play. SPOILERS. We see one twin, Stack, succumb to the vampiric antagonist’s mission to capture the essence and talents of Sammie, after being bitten. If you’re familiar with vampire lore, this changes Stack’s life as he knows it to the point where he is ‘doomed’ with immortality. On the other hand, his brother, Smoke, is left to grapple with his absence and ponder his own mortality. While the deeper meanings of the twins’ fates are left to the viewers’ interpretation, I drew the connection between immortality and mortality to legacy. As Sammie shares in a post-credit scene set on October 16, 1992, the twins’ quest for freedom, financial power, and fellowship turned into one of the best days of his life. It is clear in his expression that the twins, though no longer living of/in this world, made a lasting impact on Sammie, thus leading him to become the legendary blues virtuoso he turned out to be. It truly goes without saying that the life and passing of my grandfather has shifted his mortality into an ironically profound immortality. His memorable words, jovial laughs, giving spirit, and so much more remain to live on through those who loved him dearly. Where we ache from an unanticipated, abrupt ending, ease and understanding assuage the void of his absence. We come to know that his receiving his wings on October 16, 2025, a fine day to be free, has allowed the former giant amongst men to fly freer than ever.

Of the many gifts I received from my grandfather throughout our time, the audacity to keep going, the courage to live life on my own terms, and the acceptance of the call to guiltlessly lean into my new lease on life are ones that I hold dearest at this time. While I did not imagine starting my 30s with the nightmare of losing one of the most honorable people I’ve ever known, I can now dream bigger than before because of the way he allowed his life to be the proof of what happens when you do.

To the man, the truth, the legend, my dearest Papa, Milton F. Gaddy, who was so much to so many of us, I say rest in peace and power, fly free, and long live you.

Thank you,

Your Kiki 🖤